Its Okay AJ

In the last month or so, I've noticed something that Madison does and I can't decide if I should allow it or not. When AJ gets in trouble, he usually gets sent to time out or to his room. As he travels to one of these destinations, he usually begins to cry very loudly. When he is sitting on his bed, weeping, Madison will run and sit next to him and comfort him by rubbing his back. Most times she is whispering into his ear something along the lines of "its okay papa, you don't have to cry". She also whispers a few other inaudible things that I can only imagine include the phrases "daddy's mean", "screw them, what do they know", and "karma will get them." When all is said and done, he feels better and comes out and says he's sorry.

Sounds cute and touching right? After thinking about it, I wondered if her encouraging words were negating the punishment. AJ is supposed to be in his room, contemplating what he did wrong, why he did it, and why he won't do it again. In theory that is. If Madison is comforting him right away (and whispering to him that we're Satan's death angels, only out to hurt him!), how is he going to learn lessons? Worse yet, now AJ calls for her when he gets punished and when Madison shouts "what?", he proceeds to cry "I need hugs from you please!". Again, ugh!

I'm now torn as to whether I tell Madison to leave her brother alone when he gets in trouble, or to let her continue her therapy session. What if, by telling her to stop, I somehow create the blueprint for the way she treats her brother when they are older. What if AJ's accused wrongly of something, and looks to his sister for support, and she just walks on by because that's what she was taught to do from an early age? Then when AJ is off to prison for a crime he didn't commit, because his sister wouldn't agree to be a key witness, he cries out "Why Madison, why?" and she utters the horrible words "Because Daddy said not to interfere." How will I live with myself?

On the flip-side, if I do continue to let her ease AJ's pain, perhaps he'll become accustomed to being told everything is okay when really it isn't. He could join a cult or something all because a girl he liked said "don't worry AJ, its okay." Then when he's forced into slavery by a cult leader named "Wiseman", and addicted to heroin...he'll think its all okay as long as there is someone to rub his back and hold him.

I don't know. I think I'll just delay her going in to him until he's pulled himself together a little bit. Then she can work her magic and speak her whispers of support (or distaste of parents). That way everyone gets what they need, and I don't regret these days when I'm older.

You know, this could all be avoided if one day, AJ would just stop getting into so much trouble...

Yeah right!